Things I’ve Learned:
1) Lobsters don’t age.
2)Infinity comes in different sizes.
3) Pollution propagates more beautiful sunsets.
4) We can’t moderate the stuff we don’t have conscious access to.
5) Fleas are a pest!
6) Pinot grapes are thin-skinned, temperamental, ripen early.
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Things I’ve Learned:
1) Hell is when you’re put in a place where everyone has the same delusion.
2) You can never really know someone until you’ve seen them positively enraged.
3) It’s important to really get to know your “friends”.
4) I’d rather laboriously work for less money than gape at a blank wall for more money.
5) It’s always 50:50.
6) Nico died in a bike accident.
7) Cotard’s Syndrome is freaky.
8) It’s better for the environment to drive a car 3 hours while leaving the lights on at home than to consume 1 kg of beef.
9) I want to move to New York City.
10) Excluding tropical rain forests, the place with the highest biomass of insects per acre is Baltimore, Maryland.
11) I’m sick of going to concerts filled with hipsters who are there only to be there.
12) The Methylene Chloride I spilled on myself in lab will probably give me cancer.
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Things I’ve learned:
1) If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for a reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
2) There’s no better way to honor our fallen soldiers than with beer and barbecue. [Charcoal, of course, only terrorists use gas grills.]
3) There is an increasingly fine line between money-making and ethics.
4) There’s no point in having a small sporty car if you can’t have the power windows.
5) Enjoying good wine is like watching a football game.
6) Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun.
7) The epidemiological use of the term plague is currently applied to bacterial infections that cause buboes, although historically the medical use of the term plague has been applied to pandemic infections in general.
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Things I’ve learned:
1) All we have is now.
2) Confetti makes everything ten times better.
3) The Flaming Lips are nothing short of awesomeness.
4) I can cook [somewhat delectable] meals.
5) The real troubles in your life are apt to be the things that never crossed your mind.
6) Brakes aren’t necessary.
7) Jokes are better told in a Polish accent.
8) It’s hard to be nostalgic when you can’t remember anything.
9) Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts.
10) Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.
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Things I’ve learned:
1) Never underestimate the power of fun.
2) Religion just causes turmoil and tribulation.
3) The worst thing you could possibly do is worry and think about what you could have done.
4) The whole is more than the sum of its parts.
5) You can never completely know the mind of another.
6) History is compiled of many inaccurate perceptions.
7) I don’t like starting puzzles knowing pieces are missing.
8) Fun and failure both start out the same way.
9) Simplicity seems to be wasted on those who simply cannot appreciate it.
10) Abbreviations make things so much easier. (AMTSME)
11) The average person probably has 10 pounds of toxins in his/her body.
12) A fetus acquires fingerprints at the age of three months.
13) Every person has a unique tongue print.
14) An average human drinks about 16,000 gallons of water in a lifetime.
15) Aloe has a foul odor.
16) Getting paid to push drugs is nice.
17) I don’t archive my life as frequently as I should.
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Things I’ve learned:
1) We’re good people consciously choosing to do bad things.
2) Coming and going is more normal than it should be.
3) Routine can bring harmony to an otherwise chaotic world.
4) It really is great to be a Florida Gator.
5) My heels are still under my head.
6) Important things are inevitably cliché.
7) There’s something ill-fated about learning organic chemistry before the sun rises.
8) Every year, $1.2 million worth of pennies are thrown away.
9) I want an iPhone.
10) 2006 was the warmest year ever.
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Things I’ve learned:
1) My actions still have meaning, even if I can’t remember them.
2) My biggest fear is losing my memory.
3) You can’t be penalized for doing the things you believe to be righteous and just.
4) Most things cannot be emotively understood.
5) I want to make my own firework.
6) Everyone’s life is ostensibly remembered for one thing.
7) Having too much free time is mind-destructing.
8) When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.
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